


The Cat and the Bear

by lilactreesinwinter



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2009 Phan, Cat and Bear, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-21 22:13:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11953728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilactreesinwinter/pseuds/lilactreesinwinter
Summary: Excerpt:You find yourself thinking about him all the time. You don't know him. He's just another fan who has become an internet friend. He's posted over-the-top comments on all your videos. But he doesn't know you. He just likes what he sees in your videos.





	The Cat and the Bear

_You said that you are called Bear because you are grumpy and hide in your cave. I want to creep into the cave like the Cat that walks by himself and call it home._

You find yourself thinking about him all the time. You don't know him. He's just another fan who has become an internet friend. He's posted over-the-top comments on all your videos. But he doesn't know you. He just likes what he sees in your videos.

You chat online occasionally. Little things. Nothing important. You keep it light, you talk about videos. You are afraid to ask him too much about himself, since maybe you don't want to know. You find other things to talk about, fun and inconsequential. You talk about music and video games and tv shows. You share so many things you like that you think you could be very good friends.

You think about using Skype. You worry maybe that's getting too close. You're finishing uni and stepping out into the world, and getting caught up with someone online might not be good. It might be better to maintain a distance.

You give in and chat on Skype. It feels very close. Through the screen you can see so much. You see his room and his clothes and his games. You see the plush bear he got when he was born sat on his bed (and you see his bed). You see his dog when it comes in to visit, and you bark at it (and you make him laugh). You want to crawl through the screen and curl up on his bed.

You see him through the screen. You see how beautiful he is, and how young. You see how smart he is, and how awkward. You hear him play the piano, and you hear him sing. You see him smile and it takes your breath away, and you hear him say your name and you can think of nothing else. You want to crawl through the screen and curl up next to him.

He tells you that he has to resit an exam, and he is taking a year off before uni. You murmur support, and think that maybe that means a chance to get together, though you're too nervous to suggest something like that. He talks about wanting to make his own videos during his gap year, and one day you blurt out that you could give him editing tips sometime, and then you want to curl up very close to him, but definitely in a ball with your paws over your eyes.

He is sweet. He is thoughtful and caring. He has such a rubbish mouth on him (you swear yourself, but nothing like this). Sometimes you almost blush to hear him, but you really don't mind listening to any of the words he has to say. He is passionate in his opinions, and he goes on long rants about almost anything. You let his voice flow over you, and you lay your head down and close your eyes and imagine that your head is resting in his lap.

You talk on Skype every day, and you learn that some days he is melancholy. He talks about existential crisis. You don't really understand being in such a pit of despair. One day he is cross with you, and the next day he doesn't come online. When he comes back he tells you that sometimes he is such a grumpy bear he has to stay in his cave away from everyone. You want to crawl through the screen and into the cave and curl around him.

One day he tells you something about his girlfriend. Somehow he hadn't mentioned her before. You are shocked but not surprised. Of course he has a girlfriend. All the girls must swoon over him. Some of the boys too, but that doesn't matter. You feel obscurely disappointed, but you still want to be right next to him.

Another day he tells you he will be breaking up with his girlfriend when she leaves for uni. You can't tell how sad he is about it. You edge delicately around his feelings; you want to know and you don't want to know. You don't want to let yourself imagine that it changes anything. You will wait and be patient.

You are brave and you flirt with him. You tell him that he is beautiful. He doesn't agree but he poses for you anyway and tells you that you have beautiful eyes. You wonder at times if he might be teasing you. You know that sometimes he says things he doesn't mean, layered in irony and jokes. You also know that he talks to you every day, more than he could possibly be talking to anyone else.

Autumn comes and his friends go off to uni and he says he feels lonely. You say you are alone in your house. Maybe he can visit you. He buys a train ticket. Soon there won't be a screen between you.

He arrives on the train and you meet him at the station. His smile is wide and his dimples are deep as he wraps his arms around you. He is even taller than you are and your nose is in his hair, behind his ear, and he smells intoxicating.

You show him your beautiful city and you talk and talk with no screen between you. Your knees knock his as you both wedge long legs under the coffee shop table. Walking down the street, you keep turning to him in your excitement, and when you bump into things he reaches out a hand to steady you.

You take him up on the Wheel, and he is rambling about something but you can't listen because his shoulder is an inch from yours. You draw your fingernails down it like the gentlest of cats and put your teeth around his tricep as though you could carry him home in your mouth. He jumps and yelps your name and you bring you face up so quickly it collides with his. You feel the slight prickle of his cheek and the roughness of his lips and he kisses you. Your heart flips over and you see stars scatter brilliantly across the sky.

He pulls his mouth back and puts his hand on your chest. The space between you leaves you bereft. He stumbles on his words and says he doesn't want that and he didn't mean to do it. He doesn't think he likes boys that way, but he really does like you.

He says that he likes to sleep innocently with his friends. He is on your bed and he will sleep innocently with you. He folds himself around a pillow and you arrange yourself behind him, close but not too close. Warmth radiates off him and flows around you. You sink into the bed that at the same time is holding him.

He must go home and you can't bear to see him off, but he promises he wants to see you again soon and you believe him. You return to your bed and you can smell that he was there and you look on the pillow he held and you find one of his long, curly hairs, which you wrap around your finger.

You see him again and another time and yet again. You make videos together and play games and watch films. You spend time with other people but mostly it's just the two of you. You always have something to talk about and he's always looking at you and smiling, and you know you haven't really stopped smiling since you can't remember when.

You lie on your back beside him and carefully look at the ceiling. You ask if a girl is like a fish. He laughs and says exactly like a fish and exactly not like a fish. You laugh too. You don't mind the riddle: the answer you want is right beside you.

He asks in return what boys are like. Somehow you didn't anticipate this question. You mumble and say you don't know much, just a bit, the right opportunity hadn't really come up. You look at him and his eyes are wide and you roll and tuck your head into his shoulder and he rests his cheek on your hair.

You sleep spooned together. He likes being the little spoon. You wake up with your hand on the crest of his hip. You slide it slowly down his belly. He grabs your hand and tells you no. But he holds onto your hand and looks back over his shoulder and maybe you heard him say not yet.

You have an entire week together. It is cold outside and a cosy cave inside. Everything is perfect; nothing could be better than this. And he puts his hand on your cheek and kisses you. He tastes like pancakes and boy and winter candles. You find places for your hands and his, and he doesn't want to stop touching you, nor you him. You both learn everything about what a boy is like; it's a lesson you know you will only be learning once.

You are curled up around each other. You are home.

**Author's Note:**

> [Find me on Tumblr.](https://phinalphantasy7.tumblr.com/)   
>  [Photo of the Cat and the Bear at the Halloween Gathering 2009.](https://phinalphantasy7.tumblr.com/post/164738740849/cat-and-bear-at-the-halloween-gathering-2009)


End file.
